From the guys:
A long time ago, I knew two things about jerking off: It involved jerking something, and it felt good. Alas, if only I had known what needed to be jerked. One day, determined that I should no longer miss out on this marvelous jerking off I kept hearing about, I made a guess, grabbed a hold of my testicles, and gave them a good solid jerk straight downward. I felt something, but it wasnt good.
Oh, and from the girls, too:
I went with my dad to visit his best friend, who bred Saint Bernards. While there, I saw this large wooden contraption and asked Dad what it was for. Turns out it was a breeding support so the dog (who is usually well over 150 lbs.) doesnt hurt the bitch. My dad explained what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies. He explained as accurately as a 4-year-old could understand, and I seemed to get what he was talking about. Later that day we came home and I ran up to my mother. Mom! Guess what I learned today! I then proceeded to give a fairly detailed description of what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies, followed by the exclamation: You and Dad should do that! You see, I wanted a puppy.